One of my life goals was to write a book, and I achieved that dream five years ago (how can it be five years now)? Living HIPP (Happy Inspired Passionate Peaceful) was born out of a big transformation in my life—reaching a point of finally being able to truly go inside and discover & uncover my truth, authentic self, purpose & passion. Yoga was the vehicle for me to peel off layers of expectations, brands, people, titles, achievements and tap into my voice, my whisper, and my truth. I became so inspired that I branded this spirit, this feeling and this way of life, a lifestyle for moms (and women) to own their lives, and live with passion, purpose, health, happiness & peace. TALL ORDER. But possible because I was beginning that journey. I believe in this brand and mission with all my heart. I see a need. I believe so many women are feeling this busyness/overwhelm and routine that they need to break out of and break into a new way of being. Being present. Being calm. Being authentic. Being healthy. Being brave. Being empowered. Being more of who they were born to be, which gave birth to this brand, lifestyle, and mission.
This week I had an opportunity to pick the book back up, give it a read to clean anything up, as I am going to give the cover a new look & feel. Having had a few challenging years, the book I wrote not only made even more sense to me, but made me realize how important these lessons are and that we need to hear them over and over and over again. One step forward, two steps back. Living HIPP to me has become “tracks to run on.” When you go off track (which you will), the content, messages, and mission are tracks for you to get back on. A lot has changed since I wrote the book. A new home, an injury, a new business, losing my mom, and the serious health decline of my mother in law—life sure is going to hit you up hard at times, and we need to continue to invest in ourselves be good to ourselves and share this with the world.
As I see women work together and collaborate, I appreciate the mission of our brand in creating more collaboration and power, but also I realize we have a long way to go—women truly have not risen to the level of kindness, compassion, and collaboration that we need to move our culture and world to a more positive place.
While I wrote this book five years ago and I learned a lot in the process, I am learning more from my words now. I am seeing how true, important, and relevant many of these messages are. I have a genuine interest in sharing this with the world, which I believe I will, but for now it is a grass roots effort and a passion project.
It is a journey and I am always a student. I see such a need for women to take time to invest in themselves and be brave enough to make small changes and shifts, while accepting where they are at and honoring that. I am happy to share that I continue to believe that every mom and woman deserves to live HIPP, read the book, and more importantly, embrace the lifestyle & spirit!
There is so much power when women gather with a common mission, a positive heart, and a caring spirit towards each other and the group. I believe with all my heart that women will change the world once we all learn to collaborate more and complain and blame less. I just had one of these weekends where women gather as I co-hosted a leadership retreat with my direct sales team leaders. We put a lot of thought into the weekend, from content to purpose, to vibe, and wanting each leader attending feeling empowered, engaged, and ready to leave this Beach House a renewed, focused woman ready to take on 2017 with power & purpose. As always, it was so much more. It was so much more to listen to peoples “whys,” which is why they are doing a business from home. We are teachers, doctors, nurses, lawyers, stay-at-home moms, pilates instructors, PhD’s, counselors, authors, bloggers. We are your sisters, mothers, daughters, and friends. Reasons why people start in this business are usually not what keep them in it. While our company has a huge Social Mission which we all take to heart and are committed to, our eyes also open up to the economic opportunity and being empowered to create change, not only in the world, but in ourselves, in our lives, families, and homes. The truth. The truth inside all of us is this….
We all want to know our worth.
We all want to be in a place we can not only survive, but thrive.
We all want to make a difference.
We all want to be appreciated, recognized (and dare I say validated).
We all want to be part of something bigger than us. To be of service.
So while we are confident, and enjoy our lives and feel blessed, we also have a small voice inside that needs to let us know we are enough. Yes, we are worthy and yes, we can change the world, dream that dream, be more, do more, have more, and as my mentor would say, so we can give more!
This weekend we came together to learn, grow and share, and we leave with so much more. I am grateful to be surrounded by such caring, positive, smart, strong & fun women—and while I planned the curriculum, facilitated, and shared, I learned. I learned so much from these amazing women. I feel like I grew as a person and while I wanted to give so much to everyone attending, I leave this event with a full heart, with such gratitude, and am reminded once again why I do what I do.
I help this company with our important mission, but I also help women and moms build confidence, gain focus, gain clarity, cast a vision, feel empowered, and as such, change the trajectory of their lives.
When Women Gather, and are positive, truly amazing things happen!
XO
I have declared for myself, 2017: the year of the Detox!
I am detoxing anything that does not bring me joy, make me feel good, and simplifying things so that I can be more creative and hold space for the things that really matter. After a year+ of living reactively and not as intentional, I finally feel in the space where I am ready to rebuild my framework to hold what matters most.
I am detoxing every area of my life!
Body:
My biggest focus this year is wellness. First of all, I want to lose the weight that I gained last year, and feel my right size. I also want to be in better shape, feel stronger and begin my 50’s feeling healthy & strong. I want to have energy, feel well rested, clarity, grounded, light and get a bounce in my step again.
Mind:
I want to detox negative thoughts and rebuild my positive mindset, not only to think positive (which I do) but also to really work more in this space to create happiness, happy thoughts, feel good moments and have that winning and unstoppable attitude but also honor the nature of other thoughts as they come and go. Prayer, affirmations and study will help me as I look to make even more shifts in this area after a period of time experiencing anxiety and grief.
Spirit:
I love my spirit. I can point out a lot of things about me that I don’t like but I love my spirit. Anything that does not align with my spirit, and spiritual growth, it just needs to go. Spiritual growth is a journey that never ends, and I love the wonder of this and how I am the co-creator of my life, along with Him.
People:
I am usually fairly good at this, but I will be extremely vigilant in only having people around me that are positive, encouraging, believe in me (and me in them), caring, compassionate, authentic and kind. The rest can go.
Home:
I am going to dedicate this year to decluttering my home, one room and space at a time. Getting rid of things we no longer need or want (what does not spark joy), and creating spaces that inspire me, reflect who I am and my taste and rooms that have a feel good vibe. My entire first floor will be getting either a renovation or makeover—this will be a year-long project.
Business:
Simplifying my businesses to focus on only what is needed and getting rid of the rest.
Products:
While I have been on this journey with skin care, I am going to continue to be in search of products that are healthier for myself and my family and commit to making smarter choices where possible.
It is time to let shit go.
It is time to value only those that value me.
It is time to decide what is important to me.
It is time to not try and please everyone.
It is time to dedicate time to these areas.
It is time to be bold, be brave and move forward.
It is time to get rid of what is no longer working.
It is time.
XO
The kitchen windowsill can tell a story and can connect generations upon generations—it is a place of beauty, mess, stress, cleanliness, hope, desire, pain, dreams, vision, frustration, labor, love, scenery, temperature, seasons, fear, courage, strength, order.
Every mom has a windowsill that she perhaps mindlessly stands in front of every morning and evening, missing the beauty in the mess.
Home is such a safe place for many of us, and if it is not, my hope is that you create that space for yourself. The kitchen windowsill is a moment in time, although it appears to be a day-to-day thing, it is the window into the soul, the window into your life, the window into the growing years, and we each have our story of the sills of our life. These windows are several, and these windows connect the generations of women that are part of your tribe—your family, your life. Some sills connect another family’s story, and somehow while the stories are separate, they are connected in some way.
My first windowsill was really my mom’s, but with anything motherhood, is familyhood. My windowsill was in Rockland, MA. It was one window over the kitchen sink; it was decorated pretty, with curtains, and a view of our back yard and our neighbor’s backyard. What I don’t know are all the hopes, dreams, thoughts, anxieties, fears, and courage that swirled around that sink and sill. I know there was a lot of love. I know while it was humble, it was heart-full.
That particular sill raised a family of 5, from newborns all the way until every single one of us left the nest, except me. That sill framed our family life, the chaos, the love, the order, the comfort, the cleanliness, the affection and the day to day operations of growing up Mellor, a lot of love and sprinkle in some crazy. It endured the raising of babies to toddlers, to school-aged children, to 5 teenagers at one time. The seasons were welcomed and the windowsill was a place of comfort, as was the home. Girls became women and boys became men, all through the frame of that windowsill.
My kitchen windowsills have since changed. As a new bride, the brand new kitchen windowsill in Georgetown, MA, full of wonder and hope, I loved having my new house, newly built, and so much promise of building a great life together with my husband. It was adventures in decorating, and the reality check that keeping up with house & home is a lot of work. That windowsill first showed me that life, motherhood and owning a home is both difficult and divine.
After baby 2 arrived, I changed my sill to another new home in a town closer to my in-laws, the coast, and to a community, we were hoping to be part of. Again, a newly built home, so much promise, we settled in and this kitchen windowsill helped this mother of 2 work through a bit of baby blues. I hung my head and heart at my sill with disbelief and doubt when 911 occurred. The arrival of baby 3 would lift the depression that tried to capture me, and we would have pep talks at the sill every day that we can do this, the mom of 3 under 3. This windowsill, in particular, danced with dreams, visions, hopes and the reality of the mundane nature of raising 3 babies so close in age. This sill went through a renovation both literally and figuratively, as this Mom created ways to blend motherhood with passion, purpose and working from home. This sill held an angel figurine that my mom sent me when I was feeling baby blues months after having my second child—this angel gave me strength daily, and reminded me all is well in the world. I will be okay.
Then came a new sill. Same community, but a location that provided more opportunity for our family, my growing business, and hopes and dreams to renovate that home and create a space that truly reflected the vision and desire of my home, life and lifestyle. There was no sill at this kitchen, just windows on the opposite side, which was a sign that one needed to be created. Three years later, a big renovation created the grandest sill of all. The theme of hopes and dreams combined with some fear and anxiety swirled around this space, which has been my greatest of all. Would this be the forever sill or would we move on to yet another sill? This sill, both the old and the new, have such fond memories of childhood, the magic, the mundane, the mess and the marvel of this ever so precious time in life.
While my home was beautiful, it was time to move on. A shift in growth, there was an urge to simplify, vacation more and do less. We landed upon another sill, same community, and across the street from the 3rd sill. The view from this sill is just beautiful. The thoughts both positive and negative still swirl around in my head—the sink still fills up with dirty dishes, but the view and sill are full of promise, hope, peace and gratitude. This sill has seen much growth, much transformation, also sadness, loss and has brought our family from tweens to teens. This particular sill reminds me that it is not the only sill, there are millions of kitchen window sills that hold hopes, dreams, desires, discontents, fears, anxieties, frustrations, and warm memories and moments of pure joy. It occurred to me that it is a sacred space, and generation after generation there are untold stories, and a beautiful narrative of life lessons, and families, marriages, and celebration and heartache. I am reminded it is a place in time, and I leave my sills, so that other families can create their own memories, and other moms can work in what was my sacred space and create their own alter of day to day family operations.
I picture that window sill at 132 Moncrief Road, and it brings comfort, confidence, and a sense of connection—while I am sure the space has changed, there will always be that place in time, that family that was raised, and that mother that loved her kids more than anything and did everything she could (despite her fears and anxieties) to raise 5 healthy, happy well-rounded children. Then my own sills. It’s been a freaking whirlwind. It is going too fast. I just had toddlers at my feet. I seized the moment at times but rushed through it too. The sill now holds a precious space and time. I will never get this back. I need to be present at my sill. I need to be grateful at my sill. I need to be peaceful at my sill. It’s okay if I am a bitch at my sill. I also need to accept the part of me that is afraid, that likes time alone, that feels every emotion, both the good and the bad. Some days are easy and I look out the window (sill) with wonder, peace and pure love for the beauty in my life. Other times, I bitch about the dirty dishes, or the craziness of the day, or the list of things to do, that I miss out on the view, the season smiling back at me and saying, “you’ve got this”!
The kitchen windowsill is a magical place—it connects generations upon generations and holds the hopes, dreams, fears and doubts of Moms and families. While it shows us the seasons each year, it really shows us the seasons in our lives, and that they all matter, the good, the bad, the sad and the meaningful ones. This sill in particular holds immense feelings, and this beautiful wreath celebrates the gift of motherhood, sisterhood and that we are all connected and it is one circle of life. The kitchen windowsill, know it is sacred, know it is magical, and lean in with your feelings, but be sure to see past the pile of dirty dishes, and look out the window at the beauty and wonder of your life. XO.
Pam
Side Note: for those of you old enough to remember, one of my favorite shows growing up was “Eight Is Enough”, and I loved how the opening song included “the kitchen windowsill”, I loved that show and that Nicholas!
I could write several posts about Sunday, as it is a day to rest, reset, regroup all the while, managing kids’ busy schedules.
As a Mom Boss (a working mom or at home mom), Sunday is an optimal day to create a game plan for the week.
This is the day I carve out 30 minutes and review my week. Cup of tea, my calendar, the family schedule and I chart out my week.
I also write out when I will work my business. As I am a Mom Boss, I am scheduling my time on well, my time!
I look at the non-negotiable: kids’ activities, any necessary appointments for the family and my business appointments.
I schedule in Yoga (HIPP Girls must make wellness a priority on their schedule)—this is non-negotiable for me.
I write in the hours I will work my business (this helps to keep me focused).
I write out which nights I am out. I negotiate with my husband who is doing what and I also write out errands that need to happen.
The next step is writing out my action plan, it usually gets written into these categories:
· Family
· Work
· Home
· Self-Care (I always try and schedule in one really good act of self-care each week like a massage, mani, or at-home mask or bath)
In addition to my schedule and things to do list—when I am really being intentional around self-care and how important it is to my life and living HIPP—I will create a plan for that in which I will list daily care:
· Meditation/prayer
· Reading (this is spiritual and/or positive)
· Yoga
· Affirmations (I need to get back to this)
· Tea/coffee & refection
· Journaling
· Gratitude
So there you have it! If you feel overwhelmed or you want to see yourself be more grounded and productive and peaceful, I highly recommend taking a page from my book and having your own Sunday Game Plan Session.
When you fail to plan, you plan to fail. I have experience with both! X
The Living HIPP brand is for everyone worldwide and most of my “Favorites” are all around the country. Businesses & brands help us live a better life and on this platform, I share the ones that most readers have access to and can perhaps use and/or learn more about how to make their life more simple and HIPP!
This Boston girl has her own FAVORITES in her everyday life around the North Shore of Boston. For my local readers (if I have any), here are my favorites. For those of you not in this area, I hope this inspires you to either discover your favorites or take time to be grateful for the small business owners in your community. I love doing commerce with local shops, moms in businesses and they usually exceed my expectations.
Shopping local and doing commerce with the businesses in our community is important to economic growth and the small business owner. I love to support my local ones, and in return, they help me live my HIPP life!
These are my favorite everyday spots that help me live my HIPP life!
1. Empower Yoga Studio
Hot Power Yoga, Amazing Staff, Kick-Ass Teachers. Truly the best yoga studio on the North Shore that has influenced yoga in our area.
2. Grassy Roots
Organic cafe perfect for a cup of soup or a green smoothie. This is my favorite spot for lunch, both healthy and delicious.
3. Tendercrop at Cannan
Farm fresh eggs, veggies, and seasonal decor for the home.
4. Appleton Farms
I don’t get there as much anymore because other farms are closer but it is a great spot and I want to try dinner there.
5. Nails & Co
I like how I can get an appointment there easily. And it is clean and relaxing! I especially love pedis there.
6. Hale Street
Five minutes from my house and a great spot for an informal date night. Great food and comfortable.
7. The Black Cow
As stated above. I love the Cow because of the history. Fond memories of first discovering Hamilton and eating at the Cow.
8. Eva’s Organic Butcher Shop
What a great addition to the North Shore, organic meats, poultry & specialty store. Love it.
9. Chicken or The Eggplant.
Paleo friendly meal delivery for your family or just you. This is a great option twice a week to simplify your life. Beverly, MA
10. Henry’s
Some people don’t like Henry’s because it is overpriced, etc…. I love it because there are items there I like, and I go every few weeks. Mostly, I love the mom & pop feel of it, and I don’t like Stop & Shop.
I hear a lot from other moms and friends that they love seeing my relationship with my daughter and how close we seem to be.
I get the question or comment from time to time, it seems like you really are having fun, is it the case?
Yes. I always say, when I grow up I want to be more like my daughter.
They question, can they really be that close, the answer is yes. From the time she was a baby, she was a ray of sunshine. As a toddler she was playful, positive, and loved to dance, sing, laugh, and play. As a child, she was EASY. As a tween she was adorable and had great friends. As a teen she is a delight (most of the time). Does she have her moments? Yes. But so do I.
I always wanted for her to have sisters, but God had plans otherwise. So while she does not have a sister, she has me and I have her. We love being together. I truly enjoy her company. We love making memories together and have a friendship. I am her mother first. I say things she does not want to hear. She does not tell me everything. In fact, I wish she would open up more about things. She is no drama which as a teen girl is a gift. She is a friend to everyone. She is kind. She is thoughtful. She is endearing. She is beautiful inside and out. She is funny. She is so friggin funny.
I proudly share that she is my favorite girl in the whole entire world, which I love because I love cheering others on. I love girl power. I love womanhood. I love the women in my life. I love little girls. I love being a girl. With all that, there is one very very very special girl that owns my heart, that is an extension of me, that I love more than myself, and that is my girl! As a mom there are days I don't know what I am doing. Over the years, I have missed bake sales (who the F forgets to bring the brownies, I do, and then I have to listen to Perfect Polly make a snide remark)! I have not sewn her costumes for dance, in fact, I have lost an item or two (and have listened to the dance moms bitch or make their snide remarks). At the end of the day, I have a great girl and I know it. She is not perfect. She has and will make mistakes but at the core of who she is, she is beautifully made. She is smart, kind, thoughtful, loving, fun, talented, passionate, strong, and sensitive, and as you can see, I am damn proud to be her mom.
My girl. My life. My love. #girlpower
I LOVE the New Year. I LOVE a FRESH START. I BELIEVE in all that is POSSIBLE. I BELIEVE in GOAL SETTING. I BELIEVE that ACTIVITY & ACTION is the only way we reach our VISION & GOALS. I believe this is YOUR TIME when you decide, commit, take action, practice kindness, and commit to being good to yourself and being good to others.. I believe COURAGE is your word this year. I believe that your word may also be one or all of the following: LEADER. BRAVE. UNSTOPPABLE. RESILIENT. POSITIVE. FEARLESS. BELIEVER. DOER. CREATOR. WARRIOR. PEACEFUL. PRESENT. HEALTHY. ABUNDANT. LIGHT. FIT.
I BELIEVE in MIRACLES. I believe in ordinary becoming extraordinary. I believe life is short, we need to seize the day, the moment and base our decisions on what it is we want more of and what it is we want less of. But, keeping the focus on what we do have, what our opportunities are, what our strengths are rather than our weaknesses, obstacles, annoyances and concerns. Focus on the good. Believe in what is possible. Expect the best. See the best in yourself. See the best in others. Let Go. Yes, Let that shit go (some self-talk here)! Believe in miracles, believe in God, the universe, and all that you are worthy of, deserve, and can share with others. You are the light. You are the gift. You are beautiful and you are enough.
Let me ask you this.... What do YOU believe in? What do you WANT MORE of in your life? What do you want less of in your life? What changes are you willing to make to make that happen? What work are you willing to do daily to move yourself forward?
This is your year, this is your time, and when you take time to consider what it is that makes you happy, do more of that. Evaluate some things that you do that do not bring happiness or joy, do less of that or don’t do it at all.
Today is a new day. Today is a FRESH start. Today you write the story of your life, only YOU own the pen. You can sit back or you can jump in. Even if you are afraid (which you should be, we all are), jump in anyway. You are not alone in this thing called life, you have a tribe of people that love you. If you don’t have positive women in your life, go find your tribe. They are the ones that are building you up, cheering you on, and believing in you. Anyone in your life that is negative, not supportive, and bringing you down, it is time to remove toxic people from your life. Are you done playing small? If so, make the DECISION, make it NOW to OWN your life no matter what. It is not just about doing, in fact, it is actually more about being. It is that fine balance of being productive and on fire when it comes to your purpose and the work you do. But at the end of the day, are you happy, are you feeling a sense of balance, are you doing and being, meaning are you taking time for self-care, meditation, reflection, health, fitness, eating well, and doing the things that help us avoid stress, burn out, less than healthy choices, and exhaustion We all do it at times, the key is to get yourself on a great daily action plan so that you can be at your best in mind, body & spirit. Progress, not perfection as you live your HIPP life.
Happy New Year Warriors. Know that anything is POSSIBLE and the only thing required from you is DESIRE, COMMITMENT, a POSITIVE ATTITUDE, ACTION, and CONSISTENCY. Lets get back on track for 2017, detox things in our life that are not working, so that we can make room for all the beauty that awaits us.
Lets do this! 2017 is YOUR YEAR and YOUR TIME if that is what you desire! I believe in miracles, I believe in the underdog, I believe in the human spirit, I believe in community, and I believe in you. Lets make 2017 EPIC & HIPP. You deserve all things Magic, and the miracle is you! XO
Music evokes so many feelings and most always makes me feel better.
When I am reflective, music sets the stage.
When I need inspiration, music will take me to places I have never been before.
When I need some energy, music gets me moving and grooving.
When I want to feel good, pretty, beautiful and free, music and my imagination tether me in good vibes.
Music makes memories and reignites memories.
Music is a universal language, a melody, a line, a dance, a time in our lives.
Music calms our nerves and can bring us peace.
Music creates an ambiance, that is both celebratory and present.
Music connects the ages and stages and is both historical and contemporary.
Music is the beat of our drum, our heart, our spirit.
Music can add immediate joy, excitement, community, and fun.
Music is a love story, a family bond, a friendship, and a fight for life.
Music reminds us of where we have been, where we are at, and where we are going.
Music tunes into our soul, our hearts, and our positive energy.
Seasons change, people come and go, people grow, and music reminds us of our past, present, and future.
Music Makes Things Better! Need a boost, to reignite, to feel better, you choose the mood, you choose the melody, and you make the music play!
Comparison IS the thief of joy!
This is a lesson that every HIPP girl needs to practice and be reminded of time and time again.
Never compare yourself to others! Know this… there will always be someone smarter, prettier, more successful, kinder, have more wealth, have more abundance, be more supported, and have it going on (or appear that way) more than you.
It is a waste of time. It is not fair to you and those around you. It is taking your eyes off of what is unique about you and what is in store for you.
Women and girls are notorious for comparing themselves to others, which can make things either competitive or unkind,which is such a waste of time.
We all do it at some point to some degree. What we need to do is train our brain to auto correct when we go there. Everyone's journey is unique and what makes you special is YOU. In this highly competitive, fast-paced world, we can get lost in this awful place of comparing ourselves, judging ourselves, and also perhaps judging others to justify where we are at. It has nothing to do with you. God (universe) has a plan for you, and when we take our eyes off of others and put it on him, and let go of that need to compare, we open up our heart and mind to all that is possible, and all that is beautiful about us, our purpose, our gifts, our authentic selves.
Here are some TIPPs and things I do to help me not compare myself to others, and when I do, I go back to these thoughts or actions:
--Accept the fact that there is always someone more (pretty, smarter, connected, spiritual, talented, healthier, wealthier). It is life and it is okay.
--You want to be YOU. There is only ONE YOU, how freaking amazing is that. OWN IT, BE IT, CELEBRATE IT, and BELIEVE IN IT! You are a MIRACLE.
--It is not about the setback, it is about the comebacks! Whatever your challenges, know we all have them, it is not about falling down, it is about getting back up!
--Be The Best Version of You! You are a work in progress and know that no matter what, you are on a journey of your best life, how cool is that!
--Be happy for others. HIPP girls celebrate others, they praise others (authentically) and admire and are inspired by others. Embrace that spirit.
--Pray for your enemies. Yes, the women that you don't necessarily like. Don't envy them or be mad at them, pray for them and forgive them (hard).
--Be grateful. Practice gratitude daily, don't focus on what you don't have, focus on what you do have, not on what you lack but on what you offer.
--Rather than desire what others have, or envy it, turn that around and be inspired by them. How can you be inspired by their gifts, life, and example?
--Love Yourself even More! In order to love others and be happy for others, you have to love yourself first. Love all over yourself and celebrate YOU.
--Be true to yourself, be honest with who you are, and remove the distractions of others and get in touch with you, and what you desire.
--Always remember what other people think is none of your business. Don't get caught up in drama, gossip, and things that bring you down.
--Surround yourself with people who build you up and make you feel good. Love your tribe.
--Have clarity and purpose around what it is you want more of and what it is you want less of. Only you can answer this and know the truth. Live it.
--Be Kind. Recognize Others. Send Thank You Notes. Send Thinking of You Notes. Have Mentors. Be a Mentor. Stick Up for Others, champion others.
In this world of social media and lifestyle brands, we have moved away from authenticity to the Curated Brand. As I look to relaunch the Lifestyle Living HIPP, I am keenly aware that social media is the highlight reel, and as I share I am reminded that there is always the behind the scenes story. I love capturing pictures during my day, it might be following yoga with a green juice in hand or a fun shot of my boots and a latte or coffee in hand, and certainly they are all seasonal shots. What they most definitely are, are moments in time where I am feeling HIPP, and I am expressing gratitude for the moment and hoping it inspires and influences readers and seekers to find their own HIPP moments and to capture those Kodak moments with confidence and ease. There are the behind the scenes moments that don't always make FB, the times I feel a mess, the times I don't make it to yoga or have been eating sweets and carbs all. day. long. This is real, this is life, and so many of us do it. What I have come to realize about "my HIPP life" is that this brand and the daily practice are "tracks to run on." It is a simple daily practice of being self aware and being dedicated to self-care and to grow as a person (yet to accept yourself where you are)--some days you live it and some days you don't.
By all accounts I am middle age, and while my audience or tribe is mostly moms and perhaps middle aged women, I too am the voice for the younger moms or women, as wisdom and life experience are truly a gift I can share with others. I am always cognizant of the fact that I am sharing so much personally on this HIPP journey which is interesting because I am a private person yet I do love to share, inspire, teach, and entertain others or at least push them to be more. As I get ready to relaunch this brand and share the gorgeous pictures from my photo shoot which was so much fun. Truth be told, I love pictures. I love to tell a story, and I really love my story--I truly have taken every life stage, been challenged, been inspired to create more, and have naturally (and oh so awkwardly at times) blended vulnerability with vitality. So please know this is not a showcase of look at me, look at my perfect life… Oh no no my dear. It is look at me! I am you, you are me. We got this, we got this thing called life. I fall down, I make mistakes, I am messy, I get sad, mad, and doubt myself at times, but also, I am a winner, I get back up, I fight. I fight for me, for my family and for you, we got this thing called life together. Messy. Beautiful. Scary. Wonderful. Hurtful. Loving. Challenging. Magical. Overwhelming. We have it all, when we face it with gratitude and an attitude (a positive one) each day! So, as I share my heart, my spirit, my positive energy, know that I also have wounds, I have hurt, I have been put down, I have put myself down, but no matter what, I always get back up. I get in the game, and I play for you, for me, and for us. This post is a disclaimer (said with humor). It is not all fancy shots, makeup, lights, and camera. It is also behind the scenes moments, fear and doubt that dance around my winning heart and attitude and positive spirit. Let's dance through this together and create more Kodak moments. The Curated Life is both in front of and behind the camera, all experiences matter, authenticity is how we relate, and know that my scenes from day to day are beautiful, messy, heartfelt, fun, challenging, scary, and real. Just like you….
"It’s only a number” I hear from well meaning people, and I get it, it is just a number, but somehow to me, it is more than that, it is a milestone. I can’t believe that I am actually going to be in my 50’s because quite honestly, I still feel 30 if that, --heck, I still have the personality of a silly teenage girl at times, but I am reminded I am so much more than that. I am a grown woman and that feels incredibly powerful and empowering. While I am excited, ambivalent, and in denial to some degree that I am celebrating my 50th birthday, it is also with some sadness as this is the first birthday without the woman that deserves to celebrate right along side of me, my mom. I can hear my mom right now telling me to celebrate “baby girl” and be happy.
While it is a storm of emotions and some emptiness on this day.... happiness, gratitude, grace, hope, peace, and strength are words that adequately describe my emotions and disposition on this special day and this next decade.
A lot has happened in 50 years. I have had a lot of ups and some downs. Being the youngest of five siblings was at times a challenge, but mostly a gift. I love my brothers and sisters with all my heart, they are my foundation. My parents were the best and have taught me what unconditional love really is-- the love, lessons & leadership live on in my heart and have created who I am. Friendships over the years have and continue to be cherished. I am blessed with amazing and close friends--I am grateful for these special women from all stages in my life. My husband adores me and we have been such a team and best friends for so many years--he makes me laugh in the chaos of family life, I am blessed.
My children have been my greatest gifts. Becoming a mom changed who I am, and I have never felt so much love in my heart. Any mom knows this feeling. Getting to where I am was not just luck, it was decisions, goals, fate, and divine guidance. God truly is good, and I truly feel blessed and grateful. A time of reflection teaches me that life experiences and events are in no way an accident. They are a preview of what is to come.
I loved playing house as a child and now I love making a house a home. I was a cheerleader, now I love to cheer others on. I went to college to be a teacher. I now teach others how to live their best life. Education was a key to transformation and expanding my horizons. College was my opportunity to grow personally, make honor roll grades (finally) and as my Dad said, I went away as a girl and came home a woman. As for many people, it was a gateway to new opportunities as I began a career and stepped out of my comfort zone and humble beginnings. It was the first of many bold moves including putting myself through college, but most importantly, building confidence in my ability as a student and leader.
In my life I created some serious debt and got out of some serious debt. I worked really hard for many years and saved enough money for our first home. Setting goals and creating a plan became my road map for life--I was living what I now teach and of course live by. I have been a bride and a year later became a mom--I gave birth three times. I have breast fed, bottle fed, kissed babies, and rocked them to sleep.
I have been overwhelmed by motherhood, business, and trying to do it all. I have also come up with solutions to perhaps not do it all, but to have it all. I have bought and sold houses, designed, torn down, built up, renovated and created beautiful places and spaces. I have made four houses a home. I have been room mother, board member, PTO committee member and some years have said no to all of these roles. I have shown up with baked goods (store bought) and yes I have forgotten and shown up with nothing and have done the Mom Guilt or “Less Than” dance many times.
I have cooked more meals than I have wanted to and have called take out more times than I should have. I have partied like a rock star and have gone alcohol-free as well (by the way, the latter is far more bad ass than boring--who knew)! I have gained 20 pounds and have lost 20 pounds, and have been known to wear yoga pants only to go get pizza and ice cream--it’s all about balance.
I have laughed so much it hurts and have shed many tears. I have dreamed, I have taken risks, I have dared to be different, I have succeeded and have failed as well. My mistakes, challenge, and obstacles have been my greatest teachers. I have learned that perfection sucks and is a myth, progress is where it is at! In this life, I have been criticized, hurt, and have been treated poorly at times. I also have been appreciated, recognized, admired, loved, and treated incredibly well. I have loved and have been in love--I have known unconditional love, both giving it and receiving it. I have experienced great joy and I have experienced great loss, sadness, and sorrow. I have had a strong faith in God. I have also been mad at God. I have grown spiritually, and as I grow, I find my Christian beliefs merge with Buddhist tendencies--love is my religion and the world needs to practice more yoga.
I have had such passion and conviction, determination, and influence. I have also been intimidated and scared and in a position to pray for courage, strength, and wisdom. I have built successful businesses, written book(s), created a brand--in every step I have been encouraged by others and discouraged by critics--I warrior on.
I have discovered yoga which has allowed me to be more vulnerable and balance vitality with vulnerability--I am learning balance. I am learning letting go. I am learning to rest, re-set, and to combine that with hard work, commitment, and growth. I am embracing me, the beauty, the messy, the seeker, the girl that believes in her dreams but also encourages others with theirs. I am not done, in fact, I feel as though I am only beginning.
I do believe the best is yet to come. I have traveled to great places (both physically & spiritually) but have so many more places to go! It is no longer in achieving, I believe it is in being--and embracing the present moment. With age comes wisdom and with life experiences comes lessons. I have so many--so many from mistakes I have made and also opportunities I have seized.
I believe my calling is to teach and inspire others and to cheer on others including the underdog, the girl who doubts herself, procrastinates, compares or just needs to be reminded she is important and that she has a purpose too. I have been that girl, but more so I have been the girl that says “why not,” “why not you,” “you go girl,” and “lets crush it.”
It is my honor to be that girl for others and be their voice to help grow their vision and help them be the best version of themselves. I believe we are the co-creators of our life and while I look forward to the decade ahead, my most important priority is my family, living authentically, choosing joy, accepting what comes, and being committed to healthy living in mind, body, and spirit. Life is not a dress rehearsal, and we each have one precious life to live--let us not take it for granted, let us be grateful and choose to Live HIPP.
It is not so much what we achieve. It is more about the difference we make in the lives around us, beginning with ourselves. I am looking forward to that simple principle and to sharing my light and lessons with the world. Okay 50, I have my hands on HIPP and I am ready for you!!!! While you are only a number, I am coming for you, get ready, because here I am--lets do this!
As I sit with my feelings, I am vacillating back and forth, from grief to comfort, and from joy to pain. I am reminded of how much I love the comforts of home and joy in my heart heart, for my family, my life, and humanity. Pain resides deep inside but joy is also there--and feelings of peace & contentment can always be found in the storm of difficult times.
As I think about what brings me peace, I realize that there are rituals and practices that I am able to go to, access, and enjoy either daily or weekly to bring comfort to my mind, body & soul. I love these rituals. I truly love the comforts of home. I love the feeling of being at home with myself and also the pure fulfillment I feel when I wrap myself in rituals that allow me to replenish my heart & soul.
Here are ways for you to create comfort and a sense of peace as we enter the fall/winter season.
1. Warm fuzzy socks
2. A cup of hot Tea
3. A roaring fire
4. Light a candle
5. Wrap yourself in a blanket, grab a book
6. Soft music, jazz, classical, musical
7. A warm bath with Epson salt & lavender
8. Sun on your Face
9. Wear a big sweater that makes you feel great
10. Boots. Every HIPP girl needs a great pair of boots
11. An excellent cup of coffee
12. Hat, scarf, shades & a brisk walk
13. Bonfire
14. Hot chocolate & dessert
15. Hugging & holding a child, a pet, a friend, a spouse/significant other
16. Sweat pants, sleep pants, sweat shirt & messy bun
17. A mask & moisturizer, getting comfy girl for bed
18. Jammie Up, get your favorite pajamas on early
19. Have a lazy morning in bed, Easy Like Sunday Morning
20. Write five things you are grateful for each day in a gratitude journal
Background:
I have worked with some pretty amazing leaders. I spent 13 years of my life working for a great company with so many great leaders some of which I still embrace their lessons and the positive imprint they made on me. One in particular was a mentor to me. She continues to be a role model and example for me. It was one year ago I made a bold move and left a successful business in the direct sales industry to start over in an emerging company that had a leader and mission I really believed in.
I exited the company professionally and did all the right things, even though it was difficult. I knew I would be leaving some people I cared about and they might be hurt or disappointed that bothered me. However, at the end of the day, I had to make a decision that I thought was best for me, my family, and how I show up in the world and practice what I preach. When I formally resigned, I heard from many leaders that were so kind, that wished me well, and perhaps even respected that I made the decision to follow my heart and purpose and had courage to let go of something good.
A brand or a company is not bigger than me. I do not idolize a brand or people that work for one company--I outgrew it and it was time to honor that and move on and as such I did. Along with well wishes from many wonderful women leaders, there was some awful behavior from a few leaders that had to tell lies in order to explain why I left rather than let me live my truth and handle it professionally, truthfully, and as a real leader. This nonsense and behavior reminds me (and nudges me) that we have so much work to do (it is a larger issue) because any time a woman puts down, lies, or labels another woman, they do it to all of us and isn’t it time we get brave and STAND UP with our hands on our HIPP’s?
Letter:
Dear ________:
It is ironic to me that you consider yourself a top leader(s) when, in fact, some of your behavior goes against what any world class leader would teach. Granted, I do understand you need to protect your business, grow your business, and keep morale high, and you could have achieved that simply by being truthful and not coming up with lies. I am going to be direct, honest, and hope that these words encourage all women leaders in the world to rise up, stand up and demand we be better to each other regardless of profession, company, brand, and any choices we make. When I decided I wanted to start over again with a new emerging company in our industry, you were threatened, and rather than tell your teams (or my team) that it's okay, people sometimes decide to move on (that was her decision), you felt the need to create some lies and tear me down as a leader and person. You said some really awful things and one universal spiritual law that I know is that kind, wholehearted genuine women do not tear down others. They are confident in themselves that they have no need to do this. You attacked me spiritually and you all said lies about me and my colleagues—your words previously and your behavior at this time are incongruent. Need I remind you that the company you love so much (which you have every right to do) was started only because three people left another direct sales business 36 years ago. What if they were too afraid to make that bold move--my guess is that you would not be there today.
As my mother says, what kind of person would put down a woman's choice to do what she thought was best for herself and her family? I do not judge people based on the company, brand, social class, or community they are with. I accept people for who they are and have high expectations for how they treat each other. So, let me give you some leadership advice, and anyone reading this, to be sure you do embrace, practice, and create this in your community. Strong women and true leaders build other leaders up, they don't break them down, period end! They don't tell lies and make up stories to protect what they are afraid of. They accept the truth and act in accordance with grace and integrity. I can assure you God does not want one company in each industry--he is looking for many to grow, expand, and create more strong leaders that support more strong leaders, and he is telling us women that we are missing the mark, some of us. You see, we need to respect each others' decisions and know that there is plenty of abundance for all of us to be successful. God expects us to operate from love, not fear, fear is tearing down others, fear is lying, fear is ego, fear is manipulation, fear is staying the same. Love is positive, love is truth, love is authenticity, love is following your heart, love looks beyond boundaries, love is confident, love is bravery, love is friend and foe, love is so much better than hate. Admittedly, your actions were upsetting to me, not just for me or my colleagues, but for every woman in the world. It is NOT OKAY for women to tear other women down, it is spiritually bankrupt, and perhaps a few of you might want to take your words off of me and reflect a bit on this.
Why write this? I want make you aware and all women in general, that it is not okay to use our tongue to attack another woman. You attack ALL women when you do that. I also want to encourage women all over the world to act and behave differently. It is a choice. I choose to treat people well. I choose to be the world class leader that I am, and I choose to align myself with a company and brand that fits me today and makes me feel most authentic to myself. I know I am showing up bigger because I am aligned with the right company, just as I was aligned with the right company previously, until I wasn't. Life is this interesting journey of twists and turns,. It is not about brands and boundaries,. It is about bravery and being authentic.
My wish for you is that you no longer treat people in this way. That your heart is filled with light and that you build confidence in yourself and the world at large (not just the small silo of a company you are part of) and to expand and grow into a better person, the person that God wants you to be. Thank you for teaching me how and (how not) I want to show up in this world!
