Being a Mom Boss
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I knew years ago when I worked in the corporate world that someday, I would be my own boss. I actually had visions (before I had kids) of being on the beach with a cell phone, kids running around and working this flexible schedule (I genuinely believe what you think about you bring about). This impression and visualization (which was not forced, just visionary) are what happened to me 3 years into Motherhood.

I was in the Corporate world teaching Leadership Development after my second child was born, I decided to end my corporate career and stay home with my kids, I so badly wanted to be home with them, and have them at home.

What I did not anticipate is that I would lose myself in the process. The days became mundane to me, and while I love my kids more than anything on earth, I missed myself, I missed passionate Pam, professional Pam and my desire to do, be and have more. Equally, I missed making an income, I had made an income from the time I was 12 years old, I also had always been financially independent, and in some way, empowered me to make my life better by putting myself through college, and saving a sizable amount of money to purchase a home.

So I set out to find work, I wanted to make an income from home, have flexible hours and make $50K a year part-time. It did not exist, or so I thought!

I was introduced to Direct Sales, and I very hesitantly began a business, not entirely sure it would work, and honestly a bit embarrassed to be doing business in a living room. However, my desire to have flexibility, earning potential and work on my own terms was stronger, and thankfully I jumped in. Within a year I met my income goal, but also saw a more significant opportunity for me and my family—I would work really hard, but over time, built an incredible income that far surpassed my full-time income, and my husband’s in the corporate world.

I am so glad I said yes, I am so glad I decided to take a chance and not worry about what others would think or say. Back then it was not as well received, today, social selling is where the market is, and it is easier and better than it has ever been—allowing me and other Mom Bosses more flexibility, more mobility, and working our businesses virtually.

The income as a Mom Boss can be incredible, and it indeed did change our lives for the better. But it takes hard work and time to get there.

You have late nights, you can hear no a lot, you can question yourself, your husband might laugh at your first check, but stay the course because you are writing your own story, the income will grow when you do, consistent activity and positive leadership & vision are key.

But, it’s not all about the money, even though it is important and certainly motivates me to do more activity and take action, if I did not do that, I would not have built a business like I did—yes, there were days of me in my office while the moms were hanging out in the cul-de-sac and yes, while people were home watching Gray’s Anatomy at night (or whatever the favorite show was), I was more than likely out working or in my office, catching up on work.

This opportunity as a Mom Boss changed me as a person. I found my voice, and rather than yell at the kids to listen or stop fighting (which obviously did happen too), I was speaking with passion, with purpose with conviction about what I did and how other Moms and women could do the same thing also. It became magic when I could share it with others, help others grow and see how it changed not only me but the women I worked with.

Here are some benefits that I have experienced, as well as many colleagues in the industry or doing their own gig.

—Grew as a Leader. I developed leadership skills like never before, even thou I taught leadership in the corporate world.

—Grew Personally. I became a better wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, and businesswoman.

—Mind Set. My mindset changed, I learned so much about the power of the mind, and how that shows up in our lives positively or negatively.

—Confidence. I grew confidence both personally & professionally while maintaining humility & realness in both work and life.

—Life Balance. This has been an ongoing challenge & opportunity—while I worked hard & was out of balance, that taught me how to create it.

—Healthy Lifestyle. This is a work in progress, but learning and growing have brought me down a path of better living & better choices.

—Community. I have had a positive tribe for the past 16 1/2 years, and lucky me, two different companies with incredible people.

—Spirituality. While this is not for everyone, this was a huge benefit for me. I believe we all have a desire to believe, and faith is important.

—Recognition. At home, I did not get a standing ovation for folding the laundry, but in business, there was so much recognition & reward.

—Purpose. I believe we all have a purpose deep inside and having a business gave me the platform to discover and uncover mine.

—A Voice. I needed a platform to share my voice, my passion, my vision. This led to a bigger vision outside of the industry and into the world.

I think motherhood is amazing and all Moms are incredible. Working Moms, Stay at home Moms & the Mom Boss—there are no right or wrongs, it is best to do what makes you happy and is best for your family. For me, I needed more, I needed to work, but I also wanted to be home, and connect with the kids throughout the day—it was not always easy, but it worked and was the best thing for me and my family. I did not “do it all,” I built a team and support system that made it all work, I had to be vulnerable with this, and realize that it does take a village.

If you are afraid to start, my advice is just to start where you are. I was afraid too, I was doubtful, I was too busy, I was overwhelmed, I did think about what others would think, I had to challenge my husband on how much time I was working and not quite yet making an income. I am so glad I did not stay in my obstacles, I am so grateful I chose to believe, chose to take action, decided not to quit and chose my truth in needing balance in my life, being a Mom while being a leader and motivator. Not only has it been financially rewarding, but the real reward is also where it has led me, and how it has given me a clear vision of my purpose, and how I want to put a dent in the universe, just one person at a time! The cool thing, this is not my story, this is your story, or it can be your story. Listen to that voice inside, say no to the obstacles and say yes to the opportunity.

XO

Pam Guyer
“Back To”, It’s our time too!
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I love this time of year, even thou saying goodbye to summer is hard, it is the newness of the season and the vibe and feel of getting “back to” a routine, setting goals, having a schedule and more time to focus on work/life/goals/health that leads us to our best life.  

Arguably, September is the New Year for most Moms, we start "a new", our kids start "a new", and the schedule is oh so NEW!  

It does not matter if you have little ones or college age kids, this time of year brings out a feeling of anticipation, Fall is on the way and a busy schedule is something we need to jump in to, ready or not!  I truly love Fall, it is truly the time to harvest and grow.   

I crave this time of year because I crave getting back to my routine and having my kids on a routine.  We all do better, and this is where I thrive (yes, on a routine).   The lazy days of summer are so great, but admittedly, I enjoy it for the time that it is, but come late August, I am ready for my schedule, routine and inevitably that means taking care of myself on a daily basis.   One thing that I remind myself of every year is that September all of a sudden comes, and feels like A Tsunami—it takes weeks to truly adjust to the new routine, the switch from lazy days of summer to full blown kids out the door by 7am, yoga, work, driving kids, errands, house, homework, dinner and keeping stress at bay (hello yoga)!   While I love having my kids home during the summer, I do the happy dance when I see that big yellow bus (and these days it is seeing them go out to their cars), it is the most wonderful time of the year (truth)!  I love my time freedom when they are at school: I love owning my schedule, I love being able to go to yoga or go for a walk (my dogs love it too).  I love being a Mom Boss, I love to work, yes, I love setting my goals, sitting at my desk and charting out where I want to be by the end of the year.  I love even more helping women do the same.   

Here are some “hacks” I have used over the years to get myself “Back to” work/life and showing up in my life.  Over the years I have learned to put myself on this list, and that is where Living HIPP exists and was born.    So I guess you could call these hacks that help you show up and not lose your _____ while living your best yet busy life.    Interestingly enough, I was excited to kick off my schedule on Labor Day weekend, this week was going to be taking my schedule back and being on track—lets just say that did not happen (so be prepared that ____ happens).  My daughter got an awful stomach bug at college, we had to bring her home for 2 days as she was dehydrated and weak, then my husband got it (he went down hard), and now my son is feeling something coming on and he is home sick today.  Ummm, this was not part of the plan, so tip #1, expect the unexpected!  No yoga, no schedule, no kicking ass this week (as of today) for me—I have gone into Rambo mode (my husband calls it Pambo), taking care of everyone, disinfecting our house, and praying I don’t get this.  So, be okay when all is not okay, because this too shall pass!

Here are your “Back to Life/Work” Hacks:
—Wake up 30 minutes earlier for “me time”: reading, affirmations, meditation, exercise. I LOVE time in the morning, my Magical Mornings! 
—Make Your Bed (I’ve gotta work on this one) but when I do, it just makes everything better (thank you Admiral McRaven)
—Plan Your Day out.  I do weekly planning on Sunday, and then in the morning each day I review my game plan and agenda.  Calendar is key!
—Practice Gratitude: this helps build a HIPP life, it shifts your mindset and attitude, write 5 things in am and 5 things at night you are grateful for. 
—Do Yoga, or meditate at some point during the day.  It centers you, calms you and helps you live in the present in a peaceful way.  Breathe!
—Walk every single day in nature (just a 15 minute walk outdoors can clear the mind and lift the spirit).  Movement is key!
—Feed Your Body well!  Oh man, this is what I need to embrace, I am still in summer mode, it’s cupcakes or Kale.  Kale, choose the Kale!
—Set Goals:  What are your business goals?  What are your personal goals?  What daily action will you take to get there.  Write these down & do them!
—Create places and spaces that inspire you and make you feel good.  This may take you all season but do a little bit each day.
—Declutter Your space.  One space and one room at a time.  Donate things that you no longer use.  This will open up space in your heart & mind.
—Choose joy (happy) each day.  Revisit this throughout the day.  Look for the best in yourself and those around you.
—Be Kind.  Really, be kind to others that can do nothing in return for you.  The world needs this more than ever.  So do you!
—Drink Water like a warrior.  Hydrating your body will prevent you from slowing down.  Plus, it helps your skin glow.  Drink Up!
—Get off that hamster wheel!  I know, we all do it.  Live each day with intention, purpose, joy: it will literally change your experience. 
—Get into momentum.  Momentum in your work or business (do 5 things today to move toward your goals).  Be in it to win it!
—Let go.  Let go of the people or things that are not serving you.  You know what they are, just do it!
—Make that list.  Put things on the list that only have to be done (kids/home/family) or work.  Get things on the list, get them off the list
—Self Care: this is so important and is the difference maker.  Carve in time each day to fill your mind/body/spirit with caring thoughts & action.  

This is your season, your season to shine!  Get “back to” who you are, what you desire and your true authentic self.  Living HIPP is your platform to do just that.  Stick around here this Fall as we navigate through the amazing opportunities and yes challenges of life.  You’ve got one beautiful life, lets make it count, come back to yourself, be at home with yourself and create places and spaces that feel good & inspire you do be, do and have more!

Lets Go Sister, this is our season, our new year, our time to do amazing things in the world.  
XO

Pam Guyer
When College is Here!
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This past weekend, we dropped our first born off to college for her Freshman year—we feel grateful she is 90 minutes away, just enough space for distance but also close enough for us to visit or her to be home if she needs us.    This is such an emotional time, it is truly hard to believe we are here, I swear she was just getting on the bus for her first day of Kindergarten.  What I expected and what actually transpired while dropping her off are a big surprise to me.   I am a deep person, I feel deeply, I care deeply, and while change is great, I experience these milestones in their lives so deeply and emotionally—kind of like a “happy-sad”—so happy for them but bittersweet as we say goodbye to the childhood years, and those times when we were so close in their daily lives.    

It was my birthday, which of course did not at all feel like my B-day because I was entirely focused on getting her moved in and of course, creating a space that feels comfy and like home to her, that was my goal for the day.   In true fashion, once we were setting up her room, I was in full production mode and doing what I love and something I do well, making spaces look and feel good.  Once we were done after hours of setting up and also a last minute trip to Target, it was time to leave.   It was surreal, that is the only way I can describe it, it just did not even seem real, it has not yet hit me that she is in college, and we are really here, at this point in life.  I walked her back into her building after she hugged us all goodbye, she quickly said I love you and “happy birthday Mom” as she walked down the hall, away from me. She was walking towards her next chapter, the chapter of college, the chapter of growth, the chapter of independence, and the best years of her life (even though it won’t always feel that way for her).  My eyes teared up, but I couldn’t let it out, she turned around because she knows me so well, she knows I would just watch her walk until she was out of my sight, and I kept watching, standing alone, watching my baby girl who is now a woman, walk. Away. From. Me.  Gulp.

While it all feels emotional, it really has not hit me.  My husband said he knows what that means, it will hit me, and it will come when I no longer need to be strong, strong for her, strong for our family and when no one is watching or there, I will have my moment.  My husband, on the other hand, cried like a baby, we were not even at the exit to get off the high way to take her there, and I saw tears rolling down his face, behind his shades that covered some of it.  I could hear his breathing change, and see him grip the wheel, as in holding on to it, like he wanted to hold on to her.  The crying for him continued throughout the day and weekend, I thought I would be the weepy one, and it was him instead.  

I find it so hard not to call her, text her and check in as much as I would like.  She will not grow independence if I am checking in often, while she needs to spread her wings.  It feels like a contest with my husband and I, we joke and say “she face timed me today,” we are keeping count on who she is calling and who is calling her.  I have changed up my routines, and I think I am avoiding my regular routine because I know she is now not part of that daily routine—every night after dance she would jump on our bed, play with the dogs, make us laugh and be full of hugs and humor!  I have not yet really thought about that not being there for us, I expect her to walk in the door at any time—I think I might have some denial, or perhaps, just perhaps I have some acceptance, maybe I have prepared myself for this transition.  

We are so thrilled for her, excited about the opportunities she has, and to watch her soar.  We are fortunate in that she is on the Dance Team so we will be able to see her at home football games, which will be a treat, and an excuse to see her.  I think that alone makes me happy, and excited, and at peace, while I adjust to this new way of life in our home.  

I think dropping a child to college is one of the hardest and most proudest things we will do.  It is full of emotion, even when we are not genuinely facing them.  
The thing about time is that we cannot slow it down, we cannot ask for more and we cannot get it back.  These life experiences are reminders to be present, reminders to live full out, enjoy the simple things, and to be with those that you love.  Make memories together, and hug often, hug your kids every day and in every way.  In our family, laughter is our love language, but hugs are always part of the conversation, and how we express our love for each other.  

No one prepares you for these milestones in motherhood, the period of childhood ends for your kids, but motherhood is always there, even when your kids are not.  I am so very grateful for a daughter that is a pure joy to parent, she is my girl, my heartbeat, my life.  We are blessed with her brothers who are also my heart beat and my life, and I am grateful I have the next year with my son, before he goes to college, and 3 more years with “the baby” before he goes off as well.  The nest is changing, and time is moving, and I am watching and feeling in disbelief, and asking “where did the time go.”

When they are little, the days are long (oh man, are they long).  But the years, the years just fly by.  

Pam Guyer
The First Baby Step Into the World
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My Kaili had just turned 3 years old when she was to start pre-school for the first time.  We were all so excited, she was to attend the same preschool as her Dad, and one in which her Gramma had taught at as well years ago.  I can remember this moment, how could she be three, how could she already have two younger brothers and ready to fly the nest, at least for a few hours, 3 mornings a week.  I can remember her first day of preschool, a 2-month-old infant, an 18th-month-old Toddler, and our 3-year-old “big girl”.  We were excited, but also as any parent feels, anxious about having her in someone else’s care, she had been home with me or with my mother in law—we were entering that brave stage, when she is in another persons care.    

I remember it all so vividly.  We shopped for her “school dress” at Talbots Kids.  We bathed her extra the night before, I still remember how much I laughed when my husband said, "make sure she’s bathed really well, I don’t want my kids being the smelly kid at school”.  She has been spit shiny clean from day one, now her baby brother, on the other hand, is a different story (hello 3rd child)!  Hairbrush and put back in barrets , knee socks and school shoes, this was a rite of passage, an important time in her life and in ours.  

Will she be okay?  Of course, she is verbal, loves to play, loves books, and is an easy child, she was so smart.  

There were so many changes that summer, she just turned 3, we had our 3rd baby, adding a new baby brother to the mix made life a bit crazy at home.   We skipped off to school, and I held her hand as I walked her in.  I can remember being all dressed for the “I’m really a Mom” role, with my cardigan J Crew sweater & khaki’s, my Bob Hair (the mom doo at the time), and my cute matching Kate Spade Bag.  Yep, I meant’ business as a Mom bringing her child to school.  Exhausted inside, worried inside but by all accounts, had it together and ready to walk into this next chapter.   Ready or not, here we come!

All smiles to start.  I was able to get her inside and accommodated, with a lump in my throat, looking around at the kids and thinking you better not be mean to my beautiful Kaili.  She was fine, and out the door I went.  Yes, from outside I did go up to the window to look inside and see my baby girl take on the world.   My eyes teared up, and I realized I needed to walk away, go home and wait until I could pick her up.  

Day 2, she did not want to go to school.  She cried and cried.  We took her and the head of the pre-school assured me she would be fine and keep bringing her back.

Day 3, she is holding on to the banister at home as we were dragging her in.  It was so unlike her, she was such a happy girl, but she did not want to be there, she wanted to be home—we carried her kicking and screaming into the school as the teacher told me to do.  It began to not feel right, my gut was telling me she was just not ready.   One thing she shared with me was that the “lady yelled at her”—there was one strict teacher that raised her voice, and to Kaili, it scared her and made her not want to be there.  That and being one of the youngest there put her on the fence of being ready.

She was not ready for pre-school.  The teachers finally agreed with me, and she was no longer a student at Mrs. A’s.  

I thought we failed as parents.  I thought what if this happens at Kindergarten, and all through her school years, will she ever be ready? 

 Seeing her go through this is something I don’t want to experience again.     I can still picture my mother in law laughing when Kaili shared with her “I’m taking a year off”, as in I’m taking a Gap year.  It was a matter of fact, and that was her answer.  

We were fortunate to find a toddler/preschool program in our town that was led by a Mom and Educator that loved all over these kids a few mornings a week for a few hours.  We transitioned Kaili in and she thrived, Ms. Lawnsby’s was the perfect place for Kaili to grow her wings so that she could truly fly.  

We have seen the wings grow over the years.  We have been so incredibly blessed with one of the greatest girls in the world.  She truly is a dream come true.  My fear back then of “what will happen when she goes to Kindergarten, and Middle School, High School & College….

Will She Be Ready?

In less than 2 days, we will drop our baby girl and first born off at college and I am so proud to say she is completely ready.  

I am emotional about this (as many Moms are), I think so deeply and I am sensitive in nature, so milestones and moments are something that I feel very deeply about.  I keep picturing her first day home with us, and ask myself, how did we get here?  

In this picture, I am zipping her rain jacket, and at the time, not knowing if she was ready.

Now, I am watching her pack her raincoat, take my Hunter Rainboots (thanks Kaili), and knowing that the best is yet to come for her.

It’s a very happy time for all of us, but a bit sad because of all the love we have for her and all the gratitude we have for all those years of having her home, having her under our roof, and having her in our arms. 

This is what we work towards, and this is what we want.  This is not just my story, this is our story.

To the Mom’s that have gone before me in this process: I admire you and want you to know how brave you are.  

To those going through this for the first time along with me: you’ve got this, congrats on sending your baby off to college, you did your job and now he or she will do hers—great job Mamma.  

To the Mom’s that still have littles, tweens or teens at home: you know, “in the blink of an eye”, truly, it really does go by in the blink of an eye.  Say yes more often, don’t sweat the small stuff, be there, put family first.    All those moments you go crazy and you think you can’t get through the day, you will.  And those days will all of a sudden become years, and while you have 18 summers, at some point, it will be your last.  Cherish what you can, make time for it, and remember these moments, for they are the best moments.  

This “rite of passage” is for the parents sending the kids, but it is mostly the kids taking on this important phase and stage in their life.  

So while I have mixed emotions, at the end of the day I am so grateful, so excited and so confident my girl is ready!  It is almost time to zip up her bag, and head to college.  Just like that!

XO

Pam Guyer
Inspiration & Seasons 
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There are many things that inspire me, and I must say that words are one of my top 5.  I am a person that needs inspiration daily, and I believe that most people do.  In order to live a HIPP life, and feel an awakening, surrounding yourself with words, positive affirmations, places, spaces and people that you love and admire.   There are seasons in life and seasons for everything.  

The Goal-Oriented Season:

When I need to be in “go-getter” mode, I use words & phrases such as: hustle, just do it, work hard, focus, stretch, never give up, take action.

The Season of Peace:

While it is important to go after goals, stretch yourself and to strive for better, it needs to be balanced with a sense of peace, with a sense of calmness, and while activity & momentum is important, so is rest.   Some words/phrases that inspire me when I need to lean more into a grounded and peaceful approach is:  let go, breathe, peace, balance, compassion, light, love, kindness, self care, simplicity, yoga life, spiritual, authentic

The Season of Joy:

Choosing joy is a daily habit, practice and way of life we should all embrace daily.  If I am experiencing challenging times and/or grief, I shift my perspective on Joy.  There is a simple approach to this, and it is getting yourself from a worried or negative state of mind to a joyful one.  Imagine if you truly lived a life of joy each day, basing your decisions on what is best for you rather than what is best for others (people pleaser).  My words/phrases I typically use in my season of joy are: choose joy, say yes, keep it simple, it’s the little things, gratitude, be happy, love your life.  

The Season of Healthy Living:

This should be a way of life, and for many it is.  Even so, I find myself every season in the year going off track, feeling sluggish and not eating in the way that fuels me (I think so many of us do this and it’s okay).  Words & phrases inspire me to be on track, to put my health first and embrace this lifestyle, some are: yoga every damn day, just do it, healthy life, be fit   

The Season of Discovery:

At different stages in my life, I always need to explore and access where I am.  It is really hard not to judge myself, or be a critic, and I am working on this… Being aware of one’s self is so important to living HIPP and living life on your own terms.  Some words and phrases that help me out as I gain clarity on my direction are: dream big, vision, change, reignite, rejuvenate, transform, awaken, believe.

There are so many more seasons, but this gives you some inspired thought which will hopefully lead to inspired action to use words for empowerment and inspiration.  As I write this, it is the end of summer, we head into Fall, I am in a place where I am merging seasons, setting goals both personal and business for the Fall.  While I do that, I really need to be in a season of peace, to make sure that sense of balance is in place, choosing joy, being grateful, and leading with love (bringing love to work, play, self, others).  

Here are my words for this season.  Daily words and quotes are what inspire me and ground me in the practice of Living HIPP!  XO

Pam Guyer
Life Map
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How often have you given thought to your life, your time, how you spend it and the areas that are most important to you?

Each season I find myself revisiting this question, looking at my life, and gaining clarity on the areas that might need more attention and/or planning.  If I do not focus on this, I go into reactive mode, which inevitably will be less healthy and an escape from what I know works best for me, and what truly helps me to live my best life.   I believe most of us experience this, and that is part of life, and knowing the steps to take, and having a tool box and daily practice can help us to be on track and be balanced in mind/body/spirit.   For me, the most important foundation is health and self care, when I am working daily on this and taking good care of myself, it provides the strong foundation to work on the other areas of my life.  I believe that is true for most of us.   As we are in the last weeks of summer, I am feeling my usual feel, I need my eating, daily routine and structure back to a good place, at this time of year I tend to feel off balance, and this is a sign to start to plan all areas of my life, to get back to the balance & place that helps me to thrive.  

After coaching women in life & business for years, I know this to be true for most women.  That is why there are seasons and that is why each season is an opportunity to access where we are, and plan how we will be balanced in our Life Map.    Look at the areas in your life, and see where you are and also where you want to be.

Health: Are you exercising, eating well, and filling your mind with positive things?  Mind/Body & Spirit can truly change when we honor our health.  

Family: Are you making time for family and is the time together quality time?  What can you do to plan more of that this Fall?

God: Are you taking time spiritually every day?  What if we did more of this, and truly brought more of this into our lives?  Seek Spirituality.

Work: Are you doing work that is meaningful and you enjoy?  Are you aligned with your greatest purpose and your highest self?  If not, change that.

Home: Is your home a place you feel comfort, calmness and does it reflect who you are?  What project can you do to create your HIPP spaces?

Money: Are you feeling in debt or are you feeling abundant and debt free.  How can you manage your money and increase your income?  

Fun: What do you do for fun?  Is it what brings out your best self?  How can you add more fun to your life and make time for fun activities? 

It is the perfect time of year to access these areas in your life and decide where you want to focus most.  Rome was not built in a day and neither is your life.  It is in the daily practice that we align ourselves with our purpose, our joy, our freedom.  Look at these areas and decide how you will address each one this season—choose one area to really focus on, and decide what you can do in each area of your life.  

Your life map is not a destination.  It is an ever-changing road, with stops and bumps along the way.  If you have taken a detour, it is okay, let it be a signpost to find your path, and determine the direction that is best for you to go in.  

Mindfulness around this will help you see clearly, and embrace the road ahead.  Have a vision for what you want, and be brave enough to take daily action, practice patience and gratitude along the way.  Map it out, take action daily, and be okay when you hit a fork in the road, it is just a sign, be open and aware of what that sign is telling you.  

See it.  Plan it.  Do it.  

XO

Pam Guyer
Reflections on the River
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Our summer vacation was a significant change from what we normally do—I will admit, it was way out of my comfort zone, and honestly not how I wanted to spend summer vacation (but loved the idea of doing something different, and seeing a new part of the country I have not seen before).  Each summer we go to Martha’s Vineyard, it is a tradition we all love and holds so many special memories for us, this tradition will always be our summer vacation and a staple in our family.  This year, however, my husband Charlie and his Dad & sister, wanted to go back to the River Trip, a trip the 3 of them took twice, over 30 years ago—the trip is in Idaho, by a company called Oars.  It was a healing trip for them, as we lost my mother in law almost a year ago, and it was something my father in law could look forward to (at 84, it was an adventure for him).  It is a 4 day trip down the lower salmon river in Idaho, also known as the river of no return—with 3 teenagers, we knew it would be an excellent opportunity to bond as a family, and I was most excited about none of us having our phones, we were 100% unplugged.    Oh, make that our 3 teens and a boyfriend!  :)

I was reluctant but held that in for the most part, I voiced my concern to my husband that having no bathroom (toilet/shower) and sleeping in a tent was something I was not comfortable with and it was almost a reason for me to say, “no way.”  But, this has been the year of “yes” for me.  I have been trying to say yes to things that either push me, help me live in the moment and challenge me to break out of old patterns and the idea of “someday”.  The past few years have been filled with a lot of grief, much sadness, challenges both personally and in business, and for sure I have had better days.  This trip was not for me, it was for my father in law, his kids and my kids—I was “taking one for the team."   Up until a few weeks before the trip, I did not realize it was “White Water Rafting,” say what!?  I said to my husband Charlie, "you mean we are going to be in whitewater rapids", I have never done that nor do I want to do that (my fear and anxiety escalated and was it not only the accommodations that concerned me, but also the thought of being scared and afraid of the rapids).  My father in law assured me, I would be fine, the lower salmon is not as aggressive as the upper salmon, and I could go in the boats that felt safer.  Off to REI I went, buying things I don’t particularly like, nor did I want, including the tan bucket hat!  Rather than complain, I just rolled with it and had fun, making fun of myself and also putting myself into a look and feel that just does not suit me.  Calgon, take me away!  

When we arrived at the river and were getting ready to launch with the large group of 24 people (11 of which were my family—including 6 teenagers).  One of our Guides Kale (this guy is a dude, dreadlocks, athletic, and clearly an outdoorsman), gave us the Safety talk, he had to cover every possible scenario and what can happen, this sent me into panic mode, smiling on the outside, but inside my anxiety and fear was at an all-time high.  I was considering not going (a conversation with myself in my head) because once you are on the River, you are stuck, and can’t get off for 4 days (the girl that likes to feel in control was suddenly feeling so out of control).  I coached myself through it and decided I was in.  I immediately went up to Kale and shared that this was not my thing, I was only there for my family, and I was concerned about the rapids, and want the most conservative boat and ride.  He assured me I would be okay, and just to hold on tight—I ended up in his boat, and I am confident he was beginning to think “oh damn, she’s with me,” but to me, he was kind, assuring and chill.   I held on tight on the back of his raft, and it was fun, it was not scary at all. The beauty of the river, mountains, and scenery I am not used to, took over. I reminded myself to be here, be in the moment, and think positive (it was all mindset), this is an incredible opportunity, and I am going to be fine.   

We arrived at Camp, I decided to SUP (stand up paddle board), which was fun, and doing so on the river with the current was a small challenge, but doable.  Hanging in the water, gathering as a family, meeting the others, and chilling out was relaxing and fun.  The food was terrific, and our first night we had Salmon with summer salad and veggies.  The guides encouraged us to sleep under the stars, the weather was beautiful, so we all decided to do just that.  While it was cool, I will admit, I had a hard time falling asleep, and could not get out of my head (bugs, snakes, bears, oh my)!  The next two nights I slept in my tent, but also enjoyed the big sky before bed.   Having no bathroom, no shower, no means of my usual hygiene routine was hard for me, but I did okay, and that practice alone was a good reminder of how simple life can be, and that we only really need the essentials (even though I love beautiful things and lovely accommodations).  The toilet was called the “groover,” a bucket if you will, it was my least favorite part, but like life, you have to do what you have to do—and that I did.   Shit happens, literally!  

On the rafts & boats, I found myself really loving the rapids, it was fun, and I was now embracing it all and feeling more adventurous.  Riding the waves, and going with the flow, it truly helps be it on the river or in life.  One of the Kayaks flipped (very common), and they needed a new person for it, I wanted to do it, but was afraid, I spoke up and said “I will do it,” and at that moment, I let my brave voice speak over my fearful one.   I was truly becoming one with the River and embracing this experience rather than resisting it.   Practicing yoga for 10+ years kicked in, I used breathing techniques, I used my body (hello core), and I stayed in the moment, one rapid at a time, enjoying the beauty, the challenge, and letting go of fear because fear is a liar.  If I fall out, I will get back in.  I loved the Kayak, and remained calm and clear on the rapids—this was a significant progression for me on the trip, each morning and afternoon I would find myself progressing more, and letting the layers of the world fall off. 

Campfire songs, s’mores, new friendships, quality time with family, and guides that are amazing human beings started to fill the walls of the Canyon.  A short yet challenging hike to look over the River was yet another progression, and seeing my kids at the top, knowing someday they might be there with their children gave me chills on my sweaty body (as my husband was there with his sister 30 years ago).   Sounds of laughter, conversation and connection like we had not seen in years (that time before my kids had cell phones).  My 13-year-old niece said it reminded her of when they were little at our old house, and how they played together.  I could not agree more, as much as I loved so much about the River, the connection with each other, and no technology truly was the best part.  We had many laughs, we sang, I even heard John Denver, and I sang every word, reminding me of my Dad, and how he played his tapes over and over (I have not listened to this music in more than 25 years).  My parents were there with me, through music, breezes and the big sky at night.  The first night there was one shining star (before the sky opened up), I knew in my heart this star was my mother in law, I know she was with us in spirit, shining brightly over her most cherished people.  

Not only was it an amazing family vacation, but it was also transformational for me.   Breakthrough of fear, and expanding my circle of comfort.  Sometimes it is nice just to try another way, and seek new experiences.  Will I be a big outdoor girl, camping and such?   Most likely not…. Will I make a trip like this again, absolutely!  My entire family LOVED it, even my daughter who is a lot like her Mom.  We all loved seeing our “Bumpa” enjoy his river trip, how brave of him to do it again at age 84, seeing he was 55 the last time he was on the River.   I will admit I was thrilled to get back to the hotel to shower and have the bathroom facilities—I took my water shoes off in the shower because I had a lot of sand in my shoes.   As I showered and enjoyed the fresh, clean feeling and water pouring over my head, I looked down to see all the sand gathered and formed into the shape of a heart.  This spiritual girl knew that was a sign, a reflection of what you put in is what you get out.  Love was the catalyst for this trip, and God and the universe wanted to thank me and acknowledge me for leading with love.  When we lead with love, we bring our heart & soul on the journey—we practice patience, courage, faith, balance, passion, and compassion.  

Idaho and the Salmon River will always have a piece of my heart.   While I am back to life as I know it, I am reminded of the importance to unplug, connect with nature, try something new and make memories as we only have 18 summers, and this one is a monumental one!

Take me to the River….

Be Bold enough to try new things. Perhaps you are braver than you think.

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Pam Guyer
Focus is oh so HIPP!
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Focus is oh so HIPP! 

Where Focus Goes Energy Flows….

Focus, intention, and clarity are key contributors to living life on purpose and achieving your goals.

Many of us go off track, life gets in the way, we get caught in the trap and many find themselves on the hamster wheel of life. Let's be real, we are imperfect beings, with busy lives, and most often... far too much on our plates.  

When I find myself in this state, I bring myself back to writing things down, gaining clarity on how I want to spend my time, and leaning myself into a state of FOCUS.  

A big part of focus is that we need to make sure it is aligned with our vision, goals, and dreams.

There are times we might be “focused” on things that are not serving us—and our energy is spent on things that dismantle our best life rather than build our best life.  It is okay, you are human and this can be human nature for most. Remember, it's all about progress, not perfection!

Make sure your state of focus flows your energy in a positive, light, empowering, and peaceful way. Course correct when you are in the murky waters of negative thoughts, complaining or blaming.  

Focus is not just achieving goals and crossing things off the list, focus is a feeling, a direction, a light in which we ignite from within.

When I find myself in the abyss of life, be it feeling busy, caught in a lull state of mind or not feeling my best self, I go back to what I know works, my daily practices of Living HIPP.  These simple practices are not only important self-care practices, but also require me to focus each day on goals, and equally important, a mindset & state of being.  

Here are some tips for you to break through when you are feeling overwhelmed or off track, and gain some clarity and momentum on the path to your HIPP life.  Remember it is not a destination, you never arrive, it is a journey, with tools, practices, rituals, and actions that help you move in the direction of your HIPP life.

HIPP TIPP’s on how to Focus:

— write down each day the top 3 things that you want to achieve

— write down each day the feelings you want to feel (check in on yourself throughout the day that you are practicing those feelings)

— exercise every day.  Even if it is a walk outside it will clear your mind, and make you feel better (get those endorphins working for you)

— nourish your body with real food, it truly does make you feel better.  Watch what you eat and drink.  Again, progress, not perfection!

— start small.  Don’t try to change everything and focus on everything all at once (trust me, I know this), start out with small wins.

— implement a “focus 15” every day. This is where you sit for 15 minutes and work on the goal(s) you have set for the day in your life or business.

— Wake up early, the magic is in the morning and a morning spent in meditation, positive inspiration and preparation will set you up for a great day.

— Reward yourself when you accomplish tasks. Make sure the reward is aligned with your overall HIPP life.

—Be present, the more mindful we are the more connected we are to our day and how we spend our time.  

—Be aware of your attitude.  A positive attitude & energy will allow us to get into the flow.  Focus on this throughout the day.

Remember, where your FOCUS goes your ENERGY Flows. Let’s focus on our HIPP Life, and inspire others to do the same!

XO

PS Don't forget to download my Magical Morning Guide by clicking HERE

Pam Guyer
Feel the Feels

Feelings are such a gift for us but at times, so scary to be present with and feel.  

I try to feel the feels but will admit there are times I want to avoid it, numb it, become busy and run from the feelings.

Being a mom has a whole lot of feeling.  It pulls at our hearts in such ways that are positive but also heart wrenching.  

In a culture that portrays ways in which we do it all, we don’t break a sweat and we don’t feel too much, it negates the gift of feelings, the spirit of humanity and the most important feeling of all... LOVE.

LOVE IS POWERFUL!

Sometimes we don’t express it fully because we are afraid of being rejected.
We worry about what others will think.
We don’t want to look too sappy or sentimental.
We just don’t want to go there.

Instead, we become busy, we focus on the outside of things and neglect the feels and the true spirit that resides in all of us.

What if we took a day and allowed ourselves to truly and openly feel the feels?
What if we chose to lead our lives with love?
What if we saw the best in those around us?
What if we saw and exuded the best in ourselves?
What if we allowed ourselves to feel it all and just for a day, to treat life as the miracle that it really is?

I dance with the tide and the tides of change in my life.
I put one foot in and then jump out as it relates to feeling the feels.
It is a dance, a process, a going back and forth in some way.  It is fluid never still.  

Here are some things that you can do to Feel the Feels:
—Be Present
—Be Mindful
—Open Your Heart
—Journal Your Feelings (the good, the bad, the ugly)
—Lead with Love (positive, loving & compassionate)
—Take time each day for reflection
—Self Access, how are you feeling?
—Ignore the images on social media (remember, it is the high light reel)
—Remove the busywork.  Live with clarity and Intention through every day

Feel the Feels, you have one life, your feelings are your power, and help you align with your truest self.  

XO

Pam Guyer
Cupcakes or Kale
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It’s Either Cupcakes or Kale

Truth.  

While I would love to call myself this health warrior that just does yoga, drinks green juice and meditates on a dime, that would not be sharing the whole truth.

I love my healthy practice of those things, and I try to stay on track as much as possible. But...  sometimes cake happens. Cupcakes can be the name for ice-cream, pizza, chips, muffins, etc...   Why does it feel so good sometimes to just indulge, to find a quiet moment in time where it is just me, and I am diving in deep into sugar, carb, and salty heaven.  Or is it hell?  

I know….  I know…..  Everything in moderation….

Some wow me with this sense of moderation in everything.  I am not a moderation kind of girl.  I have to be keenly aware of this and in the right mental space to live this way.  Life gets overwhelming, and when I get too busy or tired or hungry or whatever, all of these hacks go right out the door.  

Maybe it is really good to go off track?  Not sure if that is true, but there is a saying in life “eat the cake”!  

I buck perfection.  I love when I am in a mindful space, feeling healthy, whole, doing yoga & drinking my greens.  I really do feel incredibly happy, empowered, light and free.  But there is this “junkie” side to me, and she has a voice too!  

Maybe you are the person that does not even think of these things, and cannot relate.  This post is probably not for you.

However, maybe you experience these extremes and know this story all too well.  I find humor in it, but also when you have been on a carb and/or sugar binge, it feels gross and your body screams, "get me off of this!!"

I find the more I practice mindfulness the better I manage this craziness in my head.  The more sleep I get and when I am balanced (not busy), it allows me to schedule in the self-care practices that help me stay on course and on kale.  

As I grow, I become more of a truth teller.   Living HIPP is a lifestyle brand, not for the health fanatics necessarily, it is for those of us that struggle with the juggle, that love cupcakes and kale and that desire to create balance when possible.  

Hale to the Kale, but let us not forget to eat cake!

XO

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Pam Guyer
The Small Things are the Big Things!
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After getting through such a busy season and celebrations, I must admit, it took me off track.  As women and moms, I believe so many of us do that, we get out of balance, and our desire is to get back to balance, I will be writing more on this topic as I build this back into my life real time.  In the meantime, I have been practicing small things.   Rather than rush through the day, overwhelmed and beating myself up for what I did not get done because I got so much done these past few months, I am getting my self back to my daily routine, slowly but surely as they say….


The daily practice for me right now is in the small things.  Doing little things that not only bring me joy but are good for me.  During this season of blooms, fresh cut flowers (and in our home celebratory flowers for so many events), I am placing fresh flowers in spaces that could use some freshening up.   The Kitchen window sill, I have written a blog post about before.  It is the place where we stand, we think about the monotony of the day, or the things we have to do, and if we are lucky enough or mindful, how blessed we are to have this moment, this time, this space where thoughts or gratitude swirl, as we clean up our kitchen after each meal.   The window sill (especially in New England), has 4 Seasons, 4 extraordinary views that quite honestly I take for granted many days.  The days that I train my brain to be present, to be mindful and enjoy the scenery around me are the days I feel so grateful and blessed.    Today is one of those days.  Enjoying the beauty out my window.  Enjoying the fresh cut flower, so simple, so pretty.  Enjoying having the ability to do these things, have a flexible schedule and also a perspective on life (at least at this very moment).  

Today is one of those days….
Adding a simple white flower, to my simple white kitchen brings me joy.  It makes me happy (even if I feel some other feelings too).  It is a reminder to appreciate the small things, for the really are the big things.

What do you do in your daily life that brings you joy?  What are the small things, that really are the big things for you?

Here are some of the small things in my life, that really are the big things.   It is my hope that this inspires you to implement more of the small things, with a grateful heart, and appreciate all you are blessed with, both big & small.  Some days we just need baby steps, and these small things help us to choose joy!   XO

—Fresh cut flowers
—Walk in Nature (beach, lake, park, woods) 
—A hug from one of your kids
—A love note to your spouse or kids
—Cold water with a fresh slice of lemon
—A conversation with a friend
—Lunch with a friend
—5 minutes of uninterrupted time outdoors, close your eyes and be present in the moment
—treat yourself to a nice healthy lunch
—Capture a picture of something you find beautiful for inspiration
—Meditation
—Journal
—Make a list of the top 10 things you are grateful for
—5 minutes of cardio to get the endorphins pumping
—do some yoga poses, this can center you

These are just a few things to motivate you and get you into a mindful place.  I know what it is like to feel overwhelmed, I know what it is like to have negative thoughts and feel stuck.  Life is too short to accept that way of life.  Find joy in the small things, for they really are the big things!

 

Pam Guyer
Are you an Introvert or Extrovert?
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Are you an introvert or an extrovert?  Perhaps like me, you are both!

I find it interesting that most people see me as an extrovert, and I get it, I have a large personality at times and am outgoing. 

Professionally, I have been known to be this way be it speaking, or facilitating a meeting or event, and personally, I have been known to be the life of the party (for better or for worse).   I am no longer the life of the party, took me a while, but I learned that is not who I want to be.  I would much rather be engaged with others, and having a meaningful conversation or belly laughs as opposed to small talk and demonstrating how fun I can be (alright, I’m fun, I will always insist on having fun, but now more than ever that fun needs to be authentic and real).   I share this with you because maybe you relate to this, or maybe this will help you to understand others better.  

Those that know me well, know both sides of me.  I stumbled upon this topic because I am feeling the major burden of being an introvert as well, which I love to be an introvert, but when our social calendar and celebration calendar is full (and we have a lot going on), it takes its toll. 

My extrovert persona loves to show up when I am well rested, feeling good, and know I can re-coop after a night out or social event or day.  As of late, it has been one celebration, event or occasion right after the other, in addition to working on home projects, business and family obligations, I am on overload.   The girl that loves to teach Living HIPP, feeling well in body, mind & spirit is tired, over did it (yup, I kind of can do that at times) and needs to honor my introvert self, the person that needs to rest, reflect, be alone, have silence and include serenity in my day.  

In these weeks leading up to end of school year, dance season and graduation and birthday events (and proms), it has been just too much.

I love all of these things, and I am grateful to have participated but will admit, I am glad it is all over.  I need a little “me” time, I need to get grounded, get back to my schedule and do the daily self-care and living Hipp practices that make me feel whole, make me feel grounded, and allow me to feel balanced.  

So how about you, are you an introvert, extrovert or both?

Do you take time to rest, reflect, replenish, rejuvenate? 

Do you get your energy from being around people or to you recharge with some down time?  

What do you do for self-care, how do you stay grounded?  

I am married to an extrovert, so it makes things even more of a challenge.  I cherish our friendships, I just can’t and have no desire to go be and do things socially all of the time.  While he gets pumped up by that, I become drained.   

The extrovert life is a lot more attractive and sometimes easier, it is more socially accepted and there is nothing like raising the vibe in the room.  But the introvert life is where the magic truly happens.  It is where we take a moment, we pause, we breathe and we reflect on what really matters, and how we want to spend our time and we let go of our need to be everything to everyone—we just learn to be.

How can you let go and just be?

Are you really spending your time and energy on the things and people that matter? 

Has social media changed your “view” on how your social life is suppose to look?

Are the moments and the things you see (a flower, the ocean, the lake, the green grass) just as inspiring and fulfilling in your day?

Introverts and extroverts and those of us that are both, need to be aware, aware of who we are and what gives us energy and what drains us.  We also need to be forgiving of others that don’t accept every invite and/or need some time and space to care for themselves, you just never know what is going on—we just never know the healing that needs to take place for others in their seasons of life.  

Now that my busy season is almost behind me, self care will be the main theme, and I am inviting both my introverted and extroverted self to the party—there is a seat for everyone!  XO

Pam Guyer
20

Celebrating 20 years of Marriage, it was 20 years ago we said “I do”. 

Two decades ago, it was about the wedding—which was suppose to be a Garden Reception under a tent, it ended up being a record rainfall day in Boston, a monsoon, and we had to show up with our party hats on, and rally.   Little did we know on that day, that we would bring our daughter home from the hospital on our first wedding anniversary exactly one year later, and within the next 3 years, her brothers would join our family.  

It’s all been a blur….

Babies, houses, businesses, jobs, we have renovated, moved, and sold houses ourselves several times…

Launching businesses, building them into successful platforms to support our family has been hard work.

Making our family the priority, and our homes a place that we love and feel comfortable and “at home” in.

The past few years have been our most difficult, but we have each other to lean on.  

Here is a video clip of that day, when it poured and we danced under the tent anyways.  
They say when it rains on your wedding day, it is luck and you will be blessed with children.
We have been so blessed, while it was not the day I wanted (rain rain go away), it is the life I dreamed of!  

XO

 

Pam Guyer
Milestones & Meltdowns
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My oldest child and only daughter graduated high school this weekend, it was the most amazing graduation ceremony I have been to.  One hour, incredible speakers, laughs, music, pomp and circumstance—the weather even agreed with us.   As a Mom, I am beyond proud of her, her classmates, our community and the woman she has become.  As a sentimental and highly sensitive person, I am going back and forth between wanting to dull out the emotions and be present at the time, the time such as this.   Planning her party and doing home renovations in preparation has put me over the edge (although on the outside I am appearing all sorts of normal, on the inside I am exhausted, overwhelmed and wiped out).  I swear all the work leading up to this event is in part my way of dealing with the emotions deep inside, because if I go too deep, I am not sure I can handle the tenderness in my heart—the reality of the end of this era and that one day she will really be moving on.  Of course, I am happy, and it is time, and I know the best is yet to come for her, and I love that, celebrate that and cheer her on. 

But wait….

I am left behind.  My heart will be going out into that world and that little girl that has been by my side, under my thumb, foot and roof, is walking out that door and opening new doors of opportunity, life stages and next chapters.  Gulp.

So I eat.  Cupcakes for a day.  Even donuts….    I should be at yoga, but I am so beyond the spiral of emotions that I am just eating my way through this.  I will get back on track this week, but for now, I dance with the meltdown that is not obvious on the outside, but it stirs inside of me, and my body is begging me to get back to self-care, Living HIPP and all good things found in the daily routine.  Admittedly it feels good to go off track, it is the rebel in me, the person that wants to escape, unplug, be off, tune out, re-group.  Let's be real, many of us do this.  It’s either Cupcakes or Kale, and that will be another blog post in the future.

My baby girl….  You have been my most important work, you and your brothers are my world.  

I can’t help but think of all the Moms that do this, all of the generations before me, how brave it really is to be a Mom and begin to let go.

Aside from my sentimental heart, there is all sorts of humor too.  I am so ready for the grad festivities to be over, and glad my party is behind me.  The festival of Kaili will continue with her birthday in June, and of course, this last summer home before she goes off to college.  It is bittersweet and I am going to do my best to be present, to embrace the moments, and enjoy this important time in our lives.  

 

I am nostalgic, always have been, always will be. I don’t like goodbyes.  On my own graduation day, I had a lump in my throat.  I was happy to graduate but sad it was ending. I believe the best is yet to come, and that brings me joy. This milestone is a big reminder of how precious time is, and how it is so important that we focus on how we use it.  It is fleeting, and no matter what, it will keep moving, and it is up to us how we choose to spend it.  

 

It is a rainy Monday morning after graduation.  I’m tired, this happy moment has taken a toll on me because I allowed myself to go overboard on a few things.  Oh, that challenge of simplifying vs. going all in.  I went all in.  The Milestones typically bring on the meltdown, my meltdown is not obvious, it’s a silence in me, a reminder of the importance of self-care, and my daily practices which my body, mind, and spirit crave.  It is time to get back to my routine, back to yoga, and back to Kale.   The painters are here to paint the kitchen cabinets (which could not get done before the party), she just asked if I had my favorite essential oil I wanted added to the paint.  Yes, I do!  It took me 15 minutes to find my lavender, which I use daily, except for when I spiral, and get into Lucille Ball mode, and let the self-care go sideways, and treat daily life like a game of survivor because I am trying to achieve months of work into weeks and days.  Where the ______ is my lavender.  It was a signpost for me that it is time for my daily rituals, my living Hipp and to build that back into my day.  

 

Ahhhh…. 

Hello Monday.
Hello Milestone.
Hello Meltdown.

Proud of my girl.  Thinking of my Mom.  My Mother in Law, and how proud they would be.

The feelings.  The loss.  The knowing they were not here physically.  It is all erupting, it is there, it is real.

Much like life, we step forward, we rise, we carry on.  

How did I raise this wonderful young lady?  I did not do it alone.  It was my husband, my family, our parents, and the incredible people in our life and in her life.  We did it!!!!! 

Kaili Georgie, the best is yet to come.  I could not be more proud of who you are, and I know that you are going to make big things happen, and hopefully realize it is not always the big things, but the small things you do each day to make your life better, and those around you.

This milestone is just one of many on your path.  Continue to blaze that trail, and embrace it all!  XO

Pam Guyer